Dealing with the Peanut Gallery...

Hello everyone!

In this week's email from Babycenter.com, it speaks about this is time when mothers are tired of getting unwanted advice from people.  This definitely applies to me right now (I am always so shocked when babycenter experts are right on target with my needs lol). 

First, here is my disclaimer:  I do believe that every new mom needs their own mothers or one close by to help them.  I stayed with my parents for the first 3 weeks after I left the hospital.  That was one of the best decisions I ever made.  My mom showed how to wash her, clothe her (babies fight sometime when putting those one-sies on), and she was up with me for those late night feedings.  Yes, my boo could've taken off work to do the same thing, but it wouldn't have been the same because my mom IS a mom, you know?

But there were just some things I had to learn on my own.  My mom didn't breastfeed me, and I chose that route for Pearl, so I had to get used to that.  I said before in my earlier post that I had to learn what to put in her hair (haircare for newborns) because my baby has dryer skin than I did.  Because no matter how much advice you get every baby is different.


What bothers me though is when people try to cram advice into "what you need to do" categories.  For instance, I do get bothered when people tell me to give my baby cereal in her milk so she can "sleep through the night."  God has designed women to be able to feed their children through milk, so if you doubt my baby not getting full enough from me, then are you doubting God?  You might think that's a little too deep, but when you think about it, it is that deep.  Breastmilk develop along with the child to stay as a nourishment. 

does this look like a baby that needs cereal to you?

Also, look at the nutrition facts for most baby cereals before you buy it; it will say something like rice flour, wheat flour, grain and oat flour, or something like that.  So what's the main ingredient?  You guessed it--flour.  And flour expands when it gets wet so all it's really doing is tricking your baby's stomach into feeling more full, but it doesn't mean the baby will sleep through the night.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not against cereal, but my baby's not old enough for it.  People were telling me to try cereal when she was 2 weeks old--seriously?

And cereal's not the only problem--there are other issues that people feel the need to tell me what to do, and how to do it and so on...but honestly, while I'm trying to appreciate the concern, it's become really irritating.



Young new mothers who feel me, what are your thoughts?  What comments did people make that got on your nerves?  Did you ever tell people that they were offending you?  Personally, I try to be respectful but I have had to say, "Thank you but please respect the choices I am making for my child."

For the mothers who want to help, I would say only give what is asked, and realize that post-pardom depression is very real.  You could offend a young mother so much that it sends her over the edge.